Having a friends with benefits experience can be fun at first, but it’s not something easy. The truth is that a lot of the time, these situations can be tricky, and you will end up with a variety of challenges on your hand. Plus, some people develop feelings during these situations, while the other party doesn’t. Knowing how to navigate things and understanding the FWB mistakes that people do, that will be super important when it comes to finding a FWB.
When you have a friends with benefits arrangement, it’s imperative to define it properly. You both want to know what are the dos and don’ts, what you should avoid and what is allowed. Communication is obviously a major factor, otherwise you will end up with problems right away. And that’s exactly why you want to address these things quickly. Don’t do so and wait, then the problems will continue to appear more often than you realize.
You can’t dictate your heart how to feel and what to do. The reality is that assuming stuff and trying to figure things out on your own to control the other person’s feelings, that’s the wrong approach. Realistically, feelings will develop and you don’t always have control over that. So yes, you have to agree with the other person upfront, and bring this type of situation up. That way, you will have a proper understanding of the situation and what you want to do if such a thing does happen.
It also doesn’t help if you just hide the feelings once they appear. Whether we like it or not, problems will be there and finding the right approach to navigate them, that’s the ideal thing. Don’t hide your feelings for the FWB partner. Instead, talk with them, let them know. That way, you know if you are taking the relationship to the next level, you are pulling the plug or anything of that nature. That alone can be extremely important to focus on.
The problem with having an imbalance is that at times, it can become a huge problem. So yes, you want to pay attention to the pattern. Ideally, both FWB partners should be equally as invested. If one of them is not invested for some reason, then you want to tackle that properly. But if it’s all done correctly, you will have a much better result.
At times, you end up so invested in this friends with benefits experience that you let it run your life. And it’s a problem, because you want to keep your life full and focus on what you like. Having a friend with benefits is great, but it shouldn’t replace everything in your life. Instead, try to live your life to the best of your capabilities, and focus on achieving everything you ever wanted. It’s totally going to be worth it in the long term, and you will enjoy the way everything flows together.
FWB is weird because you are friends, yet also lovers. So yes, entering this type of experience is going to bring its fair share of challenges. But the truth is that you do want to be practical, talk about pros and cons, contraception, sexual health, exclusivity and so on. Yes, these discussions can be weird between friends. Then again, you are also sexual partners, so talking about this type of stuff is indeed a necessity, so try to take that into consideration.
That’s a problem you only see in the friends with benefits situation. You are friends, you have common friends, so naturally you will have discussions with those friends. And when your FWB partner disagrees with you, then you are both talking with the same people. It becomes weird to handle, but you have to address it to the best of your capabilities.
It’s easy to enter a friend with benefits situation, but the way you handle it can make it easy or difficult. And that’s why you do want to learn more about the potential partner, understand what they like and dislike, but also where they want this relationship to go. A lot of the time, you might be having different expectations, so finding out what to do and how to approach those problems is crucial. Understand that not everyone wants or expects the same thing, and focus on what you want to achieve. In the long run, that’s going to help a lot, and it can streamline things more effectively.